Sunday, March 4, 2018

With Marriage Counseling Newport Beach Couples Can Resolve Their Problems

By Jose Mitchell


The divorce rate has gone through the roof. Statistics show that couples often opt for divorce before even considering some form of therapy to salvage their relationship. The sad fact is that it is often the children in such marriages that suffer the most. When marriages break down, it is not just the immediate members of the affected family that suffer. But, with professional marriage counseling Newport Beach families can resolve their issues.

It is unfortunate that couples in conflict so often react emotionally rather than objectively and calmly. In such conditions it is almost impossible to solve problems and to reach any form of agreement. Therapists know that one of the main reasons why marriages break apart is the fact that far too many couples do not know how to communicate effectively. In this way numerous small problems suddenly become a major issue.

Not all marriages can be saved. In some cases it is actually better to dissolve the bond. Physical, emotional and sexual abuse, for example, cannot be tolerated and the suffering partner will be better off with a divorce. The same is true for marriages where one partner consistently abuse substances such as drugs and alcohol. Unless the offending partner agree to go for therapy, such marriages can cause more harm than good.

A family in turmoil and conflict is not equipped to deal with and resolve their own issues. They will be well advised to rather seek professional help. When there is children involved, they also need to be part of the process. They may think that all the trouble is their fault, and therapy can help them to understand that they are not the cause of the problems between their parents.

It is important to choose a therapist with which both parties are happy and comfortable. The best course of action is to select someone that do not move in the same social circles as either partner. Once agreeing to therapy, the couple should understand that therapists are not miracle workers. It takes time and a real commitment to rekindle the spark of a troubled union. However, the end result will most certainly be worth the effort.

Many couples think that the therapist will hand them a recipe that will solve all their problems. This is not the case. The role of the therapist is to help the couple to communicate properly, to become willing to compromise and to try and see things from the perspective of the other partner. Therapists also help couples to identify the real problems that affect their relationship.

For therapy to be effective, both partners need to be willing to make an effort to remain objective, to refrain from aggressive behaviour or language and to accept the fact that problems can seldom be attributed to the acts of just one person. It is also vital to be honest with each other and with the counsellor. This is the only way in which to identify the underlying reasons for the rift.

When two people marry they love each other and they want to spend the rest of their lives with each other. It must be worth a considerable effort to make sure that such a union lasts for a long time. If things go wrong, as they most certainly will, professional help can be of immense value.




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